Relationsplace

The beliefs and rules you live in life play a huge part in saving your relationship. If you think that your love affair is a huge failure because you and your partner are not following certain “rules”, then it’s time to break that belief. Here are some love tips that can be hazardous to your love life if followed by heart.

Relationship Advice #1: “Your romantic affair would be better if you straighten your partner out.” Never entrap your mind believing that if you change your partner; your togetherness will be great. Once and for all, you have to let go of the childish notion that other people are responsible for your own happiness.

Relationship Advice #2: “There is a right way and a wrong way to make your love life successful.” Each person is unique and when two unique individuals come together, it creates a very special and distinct bonding.

There is no definite way or “rule” to have a successful love affair.

Relationship Advice #3: “A deep and loving affair has nothing to do with sex.” Believing that sex is unimportant is detrimental to your relationship. Sex is what makes your bond special. It takes you to a deep level of intimacy. It takes you away from your daily pressures. Give time to savor and enjoy this gift in your romantic affair.

Relationship Advice #4: “A successful togetherness allows you to vent all your feelings.” Having the privilege to pour your heart out in a relationship is truly fulfilling, but when you utter something out in the peak of your anger, then it can be a totally different thing.

You are taking a risk of hurting your romance permanently. Uncensored venting has caused so many couples to break-up because one partner cannot forgive what the other partner has said during the heat of the moment. When you are angry, get out and steam out. Bite your tongue before you say something that you might regret for the rest of your life.

Relationship Advice #5: “A successful relationship is a peaceful one.” Everybody argues, even the most emotionally stable couple. Arguing can actually be healthy, as long as it’s approached properly. It can release tension and deep seated issues and produce a sense of trust knowing that you can share your deep seated issues without being embarrassed or forsaken. So don’t worry about how many times you argue, instead worry about how you argue. When you argue, focus on the issue at hand and never attack your partner. Also be sure to have a closure after each argument, you may agree to disagree, but be sure that both of you achieved closure.

Relationship Advice #6: “A successful togetherness requires great romance.” Yes, your love affair should have enough romance to last you a lifetime. But you have to be realistic enough to know that the wild passion of romance occurs only in the first phase of the relationship (honeymoon stage), after a while it matures into a deep, more secure kind of love. It doesn’t mean that when the wild passion has faded away there is something wrong with your togetherness. It simply means that you are moving into another level of intimacy. You can still experience that “wild passion” but not as often as before.

There is all kinds of “how to” advice out there that tell you what to do and what not to do, but I have always believed that each relationship is special and couples should only do what works for them. Do not be afraid to explore and have fun at the same time.

Ruth Purple

You may wonder why therapists and psychologists are often so interested in what happened to you in your past. After all, that was many years ago and you’re obviously not the same person that you were back then. So what’s the big deal about reliving those painful past events?

Here’s why these past events are important.  Let’s say you were my client. It isn’t necessarily what happened to you that I’m interested in.  Instead, it’s the coping skills you developed in response to those events that I’m trying to discover.  Those coping skills will have an effect on any romantic relationship you enter…. guaranteed.

Here are a couple of examples:

Some people have parents who were violent. While growing up they learned to cope by becoming peacemakers. As a result, they never argue…..ever.  They do almost anything to avoid conflict.  In a relationship, sometimes arguing is good. Always avoiding conflict can truly become a problem. You can’t really have a passionate relationship without some disagreements. Others experienced rejection multiple times.

To cope with that pain, they became guarded. As an adult, they are extremely selective who they date to prevent anyone from rejecting them again. In fact, they are often so afraid of being rejected that they seek constant reassurance. This pattern often causes them to be rejected again by their partner who ends up feeling that they are “too needy.”  I could list dozens of ways men and women learn to cope with painful circumstances from their past. These are ways of coping which is why they are called Coping Skills.

What’s important is that you know what your coping skills are and how they affect you in a relationship.  If you don’t know these key details about yourself, you’ll most likely be the type of person that thinks, “If I just meet the right person, everything will be fine in my life.” I promise you, regardless of who you date or marry; the Coping Skills you learned growing up will be exposed in a relationship. However, if you are aware of your Coping Skills, then you can change them.

This is how a woman can transform her relationships. If you’re not sure where to start, you can begin with free online articles. The Internet is full of helpful tips that don’t cost a thing.

To get more in-depth insights, you could also buy a book that will provide you with detailed information on how to transform yourself and your relationships. After working with couples and individuals for years, I wrote The Woman Men Adore as a way of showing women how to become aware of their coping skills and replace them with new tools and skills that are captivating to men.

Of course, there are many other fine books out there besides mine. John Gray, Dr. Phil and a host of others have written popular books that have proven to be very helpful to millions of men and women.

Finally, for the fastest changes, find a professional to work with. It may cost more, but the results are often much faster than trying to do it on your own. Sometimes all that is needed is one or two insights to dramatically change your future.

Bob Grant
Author of The Woman Men Adore

Who doesn’t want to be kissed? Nobody. Each and every one of us loves it. It has that certain magic that leaves us in a daze. Kissing passionately is truly one magical art. It enchants…enthralls.

Kissing passionately is usually a prelude to a more appetizing and exciting action. Even the acclaimed and brilliant Italian conductor, Arturo Toscanini once said about kissing, “I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven’t had time for tobacco since.” Kissing passionately brings out the romantic in us. It breaks any love barriers and rekindles dying passion.

For the young and budding love, kissing passionately gives way to the next level of the relationship, and for the old lovers, putting passion in your usual blunt lip-locking activity will surely fire- up that charred sex life. For the young women out there who is looking for love, it helps to know that fifty- nine percent of males would never pursue a relationship if their lip-locking didn’t spark any desire. And for the old love affair, it really doesn’t hurt to give conscious effort to surprise your partner with your once passionate kiss.

For all who needs magic in their relationship, how to kiss passionately is as easy as one, two, three, but comes with a million benefits.

Read through and internalize.

How to kiss passionately:

1. Prepare. The preparation in kissing passionately includes having a fresh breath and making sure that you smell good. So set aside that taco and onion rings. If you’re a smoker, don’t light up prior to your saliva swapping action. It also helps if you have a handy breath freshener. For a more smooth and dreamy experience, soften the lips to get rid of choppy lips. You can lick the dry lips away, or for women, you can use a flavored lip balm.

2. Be confident. The thing with kissing passionately is you have to be passionate about it. No hesitations, no holding back. You have to approach it in a confident, intense, fiery manner.

3. The kiss. Start simple. Tilt you head slightly to the side to avoid nose bumping. If this happens, just be candid, and smile it off, and proceed. Slightly open your mouth and work the kissing rhythm. Close your eyes and feel the sensation. The sensation is like the music that leads the kissing rhythm. Flow with it. Once the moment is ready, proceed to the French kiss. Gently stick your tongue out and gently move it inside your partner’s mouth. Take note of the rhythm, don’t swag it like a fish out of the water, but don’t make it too flaccid or else you’ll be tagged as inexperienced. While you’re in the moment, you can run your fingers through his hair, and stroke the back of his neck. It makes the lip-locking experience sexy and exciting.

4. The perfect ending. After kissing passionately, very gently, bite the lower lip of your partner for a fraction of a second. It’s important that you do it gently, delicately! This sends a message that you want more of your partner. Then to help both of you relax, but still be in the moment, close your eyes and touch your forehead to his, and be in sync with his breathing.

There you have it. How to kiss passionately. Do it well and do it frequently. Enjoy!

Ruth Purple

Shaun wanted to get his ex girlfriend back. Shaun was a veteran of the war in Iraq and knew he needed a battle plan to accomplish this.

Shaun’s ex, a woman named Macy, broke up with him because she had met someone else, in this case a poet. John knew that while Macy had an artistic streak, she wasn’t going to ultimately be happy with someone whose idea of a good time was rhyming couplets. In short, the poet wasn’t the kind of man that Shaun was.

Shaun set out a battle plan to get his ex girlfriend back. There were three prongs to his approach.

The first thing he did was to smooth out the rough edges on himself. He let his crew cut grow out and had a short stylish haircut. He also started reading some of the books Macy had mentioned in the past. He figured that to get his ex girlfriend back, he had to be the kind of boyfriend she wanted.

The next prong of attack was to show her that he was a virile man that other women wanted. He called up Sarah, a friend of Macy’s, and asked her if she wanted to go to dinner as a casual date. When she said yes, Shaun texted Macy and asked where Sarah might like to go on a date.

Macy immediately called Shaun and wanted to know why he was taking Sarah out. Shaun told her that they were broken up and he was moving on. He had always thought Sarah was an interesting person and thought it might be a good time to get to know her. If Macy had any objections, maybe she should reconsider the break up.

Macy slammed down the phone, which John expected. But he had planted the idea with Macy that he was a desirable guy. This was all part of his strategy.

The third prong of attack was to use the date with Sarah to get information back to Macy. Shaun was the perfect gentleman on his date with Sarah. He brought her a single rose when he picked her up. He took her to a nice restaurant and during the date, he talked about the fabulous books he had been reading lately.

When he dropped her off, he gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek but didn’t go any further. The next day, he sent her a lovely bouquet and said “I had a really good time. I hope you did too.”

Sarah, of course, was on the phone with Macy immediately. She wanted to know why Macy had broken off a relationship with such a great guy.

Meanwhile, the luster had gone off the relationship with the Poet, and Macy was missing Shaun a lot.

Macy called Shaun a couple of days after his date with Sarah and wanted to know if the two of them could try starting up their relationship again.

That, my friends, is how to get an ex girlfriend back.